secret rich person

Sorry it's been a bit since I've posted... my butt is lazy.
I LOVED everyone's comments on the prior post and can't decide if I should do a part deux as a blog or just answer in the comment section??

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Anyhoo, on Sunday night mi madre and I went to the 5th Avenue to see Into the Woods. And it was WONDERFUL! I love the theater and I often wish that some secret rich person would instinctively know this and shower me with season tickets. Alas, the secret rich person has mistaken me for someone else ~ this someone else ironically had the seat next to me at the theater.

I first noticed her when I accidentally tapped her foot with my foot. We both pretended that it hadn't happened. She wore a red pea coat and her hair was highlighted blond. She had on jeans, which I thought was odd (for those of you who don't frequent the theater in Seattle, it is a dressy affair), and some cute black leather boots. And this is when is occurred to me that the secret rich person had mistaken her and I. Red coat ~ red hair. It could easily be done. And I do wear jeans EVERYDAY so the mistake is understandable. Did I tell you that I scored some new boots? See... jeans, boots, red stuff... you can hardly blame the secret rich person for confusing her and I.

And I know, without a shadow of a doubt, that the secret rich person had been showering this woman with rich things (like season tickets) because while I was a grinnin' at the cleverly written lines during the first act, she was flipping through her bulletin while attempting to receive light from the stage by contorting the pages into different positions. To see what?!? Those bulletins are filled with only advertising and pictures of the people that were acting DIRECTLY in front of her. I tried to ignore her bad behavior. I wanted to enjoy my once a year trip to the theater... we had seats so good that I could see the microphones on their foreheads!

As the intermission began, I went on a hunt for the secret rich person. I started by looking in the women's restroom. I also ended my hunt there as well because the dang line was so long. But I had so many things to tell the secret rich person! Did they see how this mistaken woman no longer appreciated their gifts?? How any other human being on the face of the planet would enjoy the $70 seat more than she?? The secret rich person MUST be found so I can tell them that they have over-spoiled this woman in red. It's someone else's turn.

And so, I have a plan.
I will put up 'missing secret rich person' signs.
On every street corner in my neighborhood.
And then I'll put them up in Mercer Island because that's where the rich people live.
And then, when I find the secret rich person, I'll tell them about the grave mistakes that have been made.
Mistake one: Wrong person on the season tickets - I'm the one whom they meant to give those season tickets too.
Mistake two: Over gifting. They must only give one gift per person per every five years or else the receiver ends up spoiled and undeserving.