Monday, October 1, 2007

weird things about me

  1. I don't like to touch pens that are offered to me by complete strangers. For all I know, they just put their finger in their butt crack that's infested with pin worms. I think it's gross. For this, I apologize in advance to any kind stranger who tries handing me a pen while I scramble through my purse, hunting for one that doesn't have poo on it.
  2. I don't like it when shoes are on the outside mat (the one that has dead mice on it). That just bugs me. Matter of fact, if shoes are in front of the mat I dislike that as well. Call me crazy but I don't like to trip.
  3. I like for my shampoo bottles to be in the shape that they originally were intended to be. When a shampoo bottle gets misshapen, I try my best to form it back to it's original state. My husband thinks this is odd.
  4. The sponge must be left soft-side up (rather than scratchy-side up) so that it will dry properly. If the sponge smells like stanky bacteria, I just throw it away and this is wasteful. I know that you can microwave the bacteria out but then the front of the house stanks like bacteria and this is just gross.
  5. Speaking of smelly bacteria, all towels MUST smell like bleach or else I won't use them. If they stank, why on earth would I rub that crap all over my clean body??
  6. I won't touch public restroom doors. Long sleeves and elbows come in handy for this. Not enough people wash their hands properly and I know what they were doing in that stall. Just say no to typhoid fever!
  7. I hate the sound of my silverware clinking on the glass dish that I'm eating off of. I know that this is particularly weird. Because of this, I eat off of plastic 99% of the time. I also don't like feeling the temperature of my food and glass passes this much better. Plastic wins again.
  8. I don't like chocolate or ice cream. I especially don't like chocolate ice cream.
  9. I HATE loose hair and think that it's unbelievably disgusting. This is why I will never be a famous hairstylist.
  10. Don't even think of going through my purse. There is nothing private in there but it feels like a violation of my privacy when anyone opens it up. The other day, I overheard Mr. P whispering to Little O that he thinks that I keep bunnies in there and that's why I won't let them open it. Might be true.
  11. It's difficult for me to sleep in hotels. I know what people have done on that mattress and no amount of bleach makes those things go away. One time my mom found a pair of mens bikini thongs (leopard print) shoved between the bed and the wall when she was looking for the remote control. I can fall asleep much easier when I bring my own pillow and sleeping bag. No touch-ee.
So I don't feel like a lonely weirdo, pa-leeze tell me one of your weird habits...
Someone I know (you know who you are) says that they don't have any.
hmf.

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'll just link to my list because I have too many to narrow it down to one for the comments.

http://slowlyemerging.wordpress.com/2007/01/19/confessions-of-a-friday-night-freak/

Anonymous said...

You did an amazingly good job getting yourself really right! Everyone of those made me laugh because they are SO YOU!!! You did leave out that you like things to be symmetrical....Like people's hair....

Raquel said...

Tab, I forgot that one! I also like to mow the law symmetrically. I wonder if I spelled that right?

Raquel said...

Oh yeah, TABITHA, what is a weird thing about YOU????

Tab said...

I am super duper normal. Isn't that why you hang out with me?

Dawne said...

all of my canned goods have to be label facing out, so I can read them - I have to have a fan blowing on me to sleep, even in the winter - all of my clothes(and hangers) have to be facing the same direction - my hair has to be out of my face, no strands loose!

Unknown said...

You are SO funny! You kill me!!

Let's see...I HAVE to have something on my feet... When I sleep I must have what I call toasties, slipper socks, or else I can't get to bed! I just hate being barfoot- drives me nuts!

Unknown said...

This is hysterical!! (Especially the no touch-ee part. I'm glad to see I'm not the only mom picking up things from my kids cartoons)
Let's see - I HATE the sound of anything rough rubbing up against anything else. To the point that it gives me goosebumps. I have to smell the milk each and every time I open it to make sure it hasn't gone bad. Even if I only opened it a few hours before. I'll have to think about more.

Rebekah said...

Lets see, I cant stand dirty dish water sitting in the sink over night, especially when the dish rag is left laying in the water. Or when someone (not me) doesnt ring the dish rag out and it smell like rotten milk.
Oh, I could go on and on but your pen fetish tops them all

Anonymous said...

Canned goods labels--yes! I do the same thing. Plus all of my boxed goods have to be facing nutrition label in and lined evenly like a library bookshelf.

Abbie said...

Your blogs are so funny.
Not only do i feel weird sleeping in hotels, I feel weird sleeping in any bed that's not my own. I get an anxiety attack and need to leave immediately.
Yeah I don't take very many vacations.

Edward said...

You remind me of a friend of mine who once said, "Its not that I'm a germophobe, its just that I don't want anyone's germs to touch me."

Bananas said...

oh these aren't THAT weird. and now I'm racking my brain because, although I KNOW there are like a hundred really odd things about me, I now cannot think of a single one!!!